St. Patty to Easter

So the last you read I had a date with Mr. FB on good old St. Patty’s Day… WHOA hold up, has it really been that long since I’ve neglected to tell you what happened next!!! Where did the time go… ???? Well at last things have finally slowed down where I found some time I could write about it. (However, it was fun to see how many people actually read this! Considering I got a lot of questions/e-mails about what happened to me, thank you for your interest in my crazy world… you know who you are).

This past month has been insanely busy… from going out to visit my girls on VA Beach, keeping up with my new job, managing a dating life and trying to plan my big birthday coming up I just haven’t been able to keep up with it all!

VA Beach & Job
What an AMAZING time I had out there. It was so good to see the Brit and Holly. It had been far to LONG and a much needed trip after my first publication went out. I worked a crazy 19 hours straight right before I left for the trip and couldn’t wait for a little R&R. Don’t get me wrong I LOVE my new job so I don’t mind working that much but I was really happy for the break.

I miss these girls so much and it is beyond wonderful to have their ongoing support and friendship over the years. I appreciate all the fun memories we share and the the laughter that comes from it. To start off the weekend Brit picked me up from the airport and Holly was able to join up later that night. We went to EVERY seafood restaurant in sight and didn’t stop running around the entire weekend. So from Classes, Chocolate Factories, Shopping, Playing on the beach (Both rain & shine), Restaurants, Basketball Games, Surprise birthday parties, Church, Going to Waa Waa (turns out this is a gas station not a coffee shop…oh Holly, haha), we even managed to squeeze in going to a Law School Dance! What an a CRAZY fun 3 day weekend!!! I think though when things are planned on a whim like what happened that weekend things just couldn’t get any better!

The only downside to the whole weekend is that on the way home from VA Beach I had a layover in New York that was only suppose to be 2 hours, which turned into 5! Gate 25 how I loath thee!!! I was sad that I didn’t know this before hand because I definitely would have gone out and explored New York for a bit if I did. Instead I got stuck to a wall with my cell phone plugged in (due to my battery dying) and keeping my sights on an old guy with a guitar that was on the same flight because I was scared they were going to change the gate and I wouldn’t know.

However the layover wasn’t all bad. I got to talk to Mr. FB for most of the layover and we really a great time chatting the few hours away. I got to learn a lot more about his likes/dislikes and how much he LOVES the Cub’s baseball. At this point I really started to like Mr. FB… he kept telling me how much he missed me while I was gone and told me he talked about me to some of his friends/parents. Wait hold up… friends/parents… this is BIG!

Mr. Facebook
Since then Mr. FB and my relationship really started to bloom… you could say we almost have been inseparable. He got me flowers the very next day I got back from VA. Beach and is always staying in touch with me. Wanting to know how my day is… so on and so forth. Which is something I haven’t had a guy do in a long time, but I really like it. His consistency, sweet personality, communication skills and honesty have been huge for me! Besides that he goes to church with me, which is the most important of all! To me this is amazing that we can share this together. I’m really happy for I found someone who is treating me the way I’m suppose to be treated and not like a piece of meat to munch on every once in awhile.

I’ve really enjoyed all the time I’ve spent with Mr. FB and can really start seeing a future possibly. Of course I still have a lot of time before it comes to that but the thought has crossed my mind and I can see it happening. As far as right now we are dating just each other, we don’t have any titles on it yet but I’m not really worried about that. We will just see what happens over the next month or so, I’m just putting everything in the Lord’s hands.

Turning 24
This week I am turning 24! Crazy isn’t it?!?! I can’t believe it myself… time has really flown by. I’m having a big party this Friday downtown in Circle City and hope everyone will be able to make it. But no matter who shows up it should be a good time.

On my actually birthday (Saturday) Mr. FB asked if he could take me out to dinner! Yayayay I’m so excited… I can’t wait to see what he has planned up his sleeve. I loved being surprised! So I will be writing more soon to let you know how that goes.

So…I have many more stories about Mr. FB and I to tell soon but they will have to wait till next time. This is getting pretty long right now and I have to run. Hope you enjoyed the long over due update and again sorry for not being better. I’ll write again soon… but until then I will leave you with this amazing verse I hold dear to my heart.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and will bring you back from captivity…” -Jeremiah 29:11-14

Silver Lining

(Sigh) Isn’t it funny how life plays out? You never know what new twist and turns it will take. Each day is day of it’s own, with a brand new beginnings. Knowing this along makes waking up easier and pushing forward seem effortless. Jobless or not… the way you experience it, is up to you. We can make it into anything we want, positive or negative. The only thing that would hold us back is ourselves. The world can overwhelm us with worry but is that really our purpose… to worry? What is there to worry about when life is so short to live anyway. Who said we get to see tomorrow? For myself I know if I don’t take chances, go for the gusto and live life to the fullest for Him everyday… I will regret it. It doesn’t matter what struggles I go through, it would be all in vain if it wasn’t for Him. He has blessed my life with so much in so many ways, this is the least I can do.

Tonight, after babysitting Mr. Seattle called me. Even though we only talked for a little, I could hear my heart beating. I don’t know what it is that makes me so attracted to him, maybe it is the innocence of everything. But more or less I think it is because he inspires me. I get excited to share my experiences with him and best of all I still have the opportunity to build a friendship. Even though we are far apart now and it might not be the best timing for anything. It is a beginning to something and it although there is a chance it could not go anywhere; I have this gut feeling it would be worth waiting around to find out. But until then I won’t know.

I may not be able to see the silver lining in my life just yet. With jobs, relationships or my future for that matter. However I know it will only get better, I just have to continue to stay focused and be positive. Everything has a time and place, even if it hasn’t turn out the way I thought it would. Just remember we have so much to live for, even if it means facing our struggles. When one door close, another will open.

“Clouds may come, but clouds must go, and they all have a silver lining. For behind each cloud you know, the sun, or moon, is shining.” -Unknown

Eloquent

Last night after not really hearing from Mr. Seattle the past couple days, I was getting a little frustrated. I more of less just wanted him to explain what was happening and not leave me hanging. Tossing and turning in bed I finally just got up and wrote him. Below is what I wrote first and then what he wrote back. I’m pretty sure this is the most eloquent response I have ever gotten back from a guy. I thought I would share it with you.

Hey Mr. Seattle,
I’m laying here in bed and I can’t seem to fall asleep. I guess I’m just wondering if everything is okay. You have seemed a little distant and I’m not really sure why. If I said anything or it is something I did just let me know. I rather you be honest with me. And if it is because you’re not ready to come out here that is fine, there is no pressure there. I’m sorry if I made it seem that way. Hope you have a good night.
-Circle City Girl

—

Dear Circle City Girl,
Please do not worry yourself… there is nothing wrong. I am sorry if I have appeared distant lately, the truth is that I have been keeping myself very busy and have done a poor job at keeping in touch with you. I do not feel pressure to come and visit you (I promise) and I sincerely appreciate that you have been careful to not apply such pressure. The truth is that I would love to see you. However, I am still striving to maintain my role in your life as a friend for this is all I have to offer at the moment. I genuinely mean this with all sincerity when I say that I deeply cherish our friendship and your heart and I am so thankful for you and wish to grow in this. We have spoken of this before and I only intend to reassure you Circle City Girl of how greatly I value you. I know myself and right now I just have to keep things simple while I decipher the past to enable my future. I mean no confusion. We can talk soon… and I will answer any questions that you may have. Please rest for now… Goodnight.
-Mr. Seattle

As I felt a feeling of relief come over me, I finally could put my mind at ease. I was so pleased Mr. Seattle took the time to write me back and I appreciated the sincerity of his letter. I cherish his friendship dearly and I know he would be the kind of guy worth waiting on. It just goes to show, that there are still men out there that respect woman. Holding good moral values, while guarding your heart at the same time. I feel truly blessed and thankful to have been able to experience such a man.

A Little Distant?

The last couple days I’ve had the feeling I’m being a bother to Mr. Seattle. I haven’t quite figured out what happened or what has changed. However our conversations just have seemed a little more distant than usual and they are becoming shorter. I can’t put my finger on it, but I know something isn’t right.

Below are some reasons I think why he might be a little distant…

1. Maybe he is busy. (hoping that is the case, but not likely)
2. Maybe he isn’t interested anymore.
3. Maybe an old flame came back into his life.
4. Maybe he feels like it is going too fast.
5. Maybe he thinks we live too far apart to start a relationship.

I don’t want to jump the gun just yet but, I think I will let things lay low for now. I really like Mr. Seattle and I was hoping that things wouldn’t come to this. The one good thing about our friendship is that he hasn’t over promised me anything. So even though I would hate the thought of nothing coming out of this, at least I’ve guarded my heart and I’m not in over my head. Who knows what could happen, maybe I could be totally wrong about everything. But usually whenever I get this gut feeling, it means something is up. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.

I Cherish You

As of today it has been officially one month since Mr. Seattle and I started talking! I have to laugh at myself, because I’m not even in a “relationship” with the guy yet. However, I’m already put an anniversary on the day we started a friendship, oh well… I like it (p.s. I didn’t share that information with him, it just me being a helpless romantic). In all honesty I’m so happy I wrote him those five words to him on facebook… “Just thought I’d say hey.” Even though we are miles apart, this whole experience has been way beyond what I ever anticipated or expected. Who would have ever thought doing something like that would turn into such a beautiful friendship? Our friendship has truly been a huge blessing to me.

For the longest time I’ve been disappointed by guys in general, finding they only want something when it is convenient for them. But I find Mr. Seattle to be different, he genuinely seems interested in me for who I am and not what I look like. Which is an awesome feeling to have for once! There are so many great qualities and characteristics Mr. Seattle has that I’ve noticed I really enjoyed. It has been a pleasure hearing him share his heart, thoughts and experiences. I never thought I would be able to have this much fun getting to know someone! It just makes me realize how bad I was treated in some of my past relationships. Probably one of the biggest reasons I’ve grown to cherish Mr. Seattle so much this past month. I finally get what it feels like to have a “real” relationship. Whatever comes of all this… call me old fashioned but, I know if I can grow old with someone that loves the Lord, cares for me unconditionally, and wants to share a life together being best friends… I would be the happiest woman alive. Even though it has only been one month, at least I know the feelings I’ve grown to have for Mr. Seattle are real.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Building a Friendship

The last couple days Mr. Seattle and I have been talking over the phone and getting to know each other better. It has been awesome getting to know him without all the pressure of a relationship yet. The other day we spent two hours talking, about all kinds of things. Mr. Seattle is seriously so entertaining to talk to because we talk in the same way. We both skip around in conversations a lot, it drives others crazy but for us it seems normal. I’m starting to really value the friendship that is building between us. Who knows where this might be headed but it is looking brighter all the time.

Still… you are Family

I know this might sound complicated or a little strange, but I’m still really close with my first boyfriend’s family (CK and I had dated for five years back in the good old days, when life was easy). Being in a relationship with CK for five years, I pretty much grew up with his family. Even now, they still seem like my family away from home. Anyway, this year his sister Doll invited me over for Thanksgiving in Circle City (fyi: CK and his parents were not there, just in case you were wondering). I’m so blessed they still even want me to even be around their family during the holidays. Their friendship is priceless to me and the love they have shown me speaks volumes. Thanksgiving was such a blast, I can’t explain to you how much fun it was! I spent the entire day over Doll’s house eating, playing Apples to Apples with the girls and enjoying everyone’s company. The best part about that day was right before dinner we had testimony and worship time. I think this is what I miss the most about spending Thanksgiving with CK’s family. It was so meaningful for me to still be able to sit down and share what I’m thankful for with them. The next day a bunch of us all headed down to Mitch & Doll’s cabin for the night. Molls, Kris, Joel, Charlie and I spent most of the time down there together building campfires, four-wheeling, shooting guns and just having fun hanging out. Since CK and I stopped dating, it had been two years since I’ve been down to the cabin. I was amazed how little it changed, the cabin seemed like it was stuck in time capsule. I never thought I would ever get the chance to go back there, just goes to show you just never know what little curve balls life will throw at you. Needless to say I left the cabin and the Thanksgiving weekend behind with a full heart. I truly believe being around family is so important during the holidays. Even though I couldn’t spend Thanksgiving this year with my own family, I still felt like I was.

“You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them.” -Desmond Tutu

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving, is that time of year for loads of food, warm winter sweaters and being around those you love. Coming to a table of family and friends in remembrance for all that we have to be thankful for. For myself this year has been incredibly hard but I couldn’t be more thankful for the friends and family God has blessed me with. It has been through their encouragement, friendship and love that I have been able to push through all the struggles that have crossed my path. Without them and my Father’s undying love for me I would have not gotten through all of it. Here is a short re-cap of what I’m thankful for: My company went through three layoffs, I’m thankful I still have a job. After three months I found out my boyfriend cheated on me with his ex, I’m thankful I found out before I got too far into it. I ran my second marathon this year, I’m thankful I finished well. Dating again has been a huge rollercoaster ride, I’m thankful I’m not in any bad relationships and I am learning to be content being single. I almost made a huge mistake by moving to B-Ripple, I’m thankful God took me out of that situation. When my wallet and all my credit cards got stolen, I’m thankful nothing bad happened and even though it was a pain I got everything taken care of. I moved into my first one bedroom apartment, I’m thankful God provided the funds to do that. And when I thought all was lost and it didn’t seem like there was anywhere to turn, I’m thankful God was right there beside me. Needless to say I have much to be thankful for. Even though my struggles may seem minuscule compared to the rest of the world, they really challenged me this year to grow stronger and deeper in my faith than ever before. I hope each and every one of you has a wonderful thanksgiving and is blessed by the ones you love. Lastly, I will leave you with a verse that I hold dear to my heart. It will be my prayer for you this Thanksgiving.

“I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart; for whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.” – Philippians 1:3-11